Be not alarmed! The following are simply images… images of what I hope aliens look like, as sort of my homage to Aliens this festive season of Halloween. It’s as a simple as that. Note: In no means is this is a survival guide meant to help you during an impeding attack, as I don’t have that sort of authori-tay.

The practical alien:

I would hope aliens would look like this because if they did they would be slower and shorter than I am. This being said, I might survive an attack, and thus, making them practical. The same argument can be made for as slow vs. fast zombies. Granted, they still might have laser guns, which I would have no chance out running, and neither would you. And though this particular picture shows a woman who, well, got attacked, I would like to assume that she was weak and probably deserved it- the damsel type, yah know? Oh, and one last note, I’d have him wearing a long, high-collard metallic silver coat. For effect.


The futuristic alien:

If aliens were more like robots (which, in many movies they are), I would hope that they would look like Bjork from her video for All Is Full of Love and not just some dumb cybertron type being. Friendly, sleek, but still creepy.

The alien in human form:

This might not be my first choice of how I would like human-esque aliens to look, I would rather them look (and sound) like Ira Glass, but this is the most probable of the alien-to-human transformations I think. And no, it is not too soon.

The scary alien:

I almost chose the picture of the late M.J. to serve also as the scary version of aliens, but decided this was more appropriate while still maintaining similar lines. Truthfully though, I really wish that there were no possibilities of scary aliens, but if I had to chose, I would chose the aliens from They Live because they look just like humans- which means unless you have bad ass glasses which will help you determine the reals from the fakes, forget it, you’re a goner. Nothing is more scary than perfect camouflage. Classic.

In the off chance I would have to create babies with an alien, alien:

Okay, so I know that Spock is only really half alien, but that’s what I’m saying. I already know that breading with this particular alien species would work and not result in one of those scary scenes when an alien eats its way out of my abdominal cavity. As if birth wasn’t gross enough already. And I know there are people who like other, older Spocks better, but this one is more in my age range. The hair cut… might have to go though. My aunt could probably take care of this for me. But yes, I would have alien babies if need be with new Spock.

The lovable alien:

It came down to A.L.F. and E.T.- both have initials for names, but only one came out on top, and let’s face it, A.L.F. ate cats, so I had no choice but to choose E.T. He liked Reeses Pieces… much better feasting option.

The pet alien:

Why can’t real animals be this cute? I don’t know what this is from… probably Japan.


And just for fun, because this post was short:

The alien boy who wasted my time- Balloon Boy. Look at him. Effing alien. He even had that phony space ship. In fact, when I first turned on the news that day and saw the headline Balloon Boy and then the fake craft, my mind flashed back to the movie Signs (not great, I know) when they turn on the TV and there were alien ships and I thought maybe there was a UFO in our real life midst- but no, it was a “tragic” missing child story that turned up with no conclusion of interest.

So there you have it. For future film makers, particularly of the SciFi alien type movies, cut out the others and focus in on these types please, so that I will watch your movie in theaters and not pirated online.


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